10. You can tell by the nice clean puddle underneath the tractor that oil has been changed regularly.
9. What’s she need four teats for — she’s only going to have one calf.
8. All you’ll have to do is drive these calves past some corn and they’ll gain weight.
7. So the fenders have rusted off — less weight, better performance.
6. Well, I guess you’ll be able to sneak up on this ol’ cow from one side and she’ll never see you coming.
5. There’s a lot to be said for having a combine nobody wants to borrow.
4. Any sow that can make a crippled-up ring man jump a 6-foot fence is gonna be a heckuva mother.
3. This is a one-in-a-million calf — actually, according to USDA, he’s one in 40.6 million.
2. Every cowherd needs one like this just to keep the cowboys awake.
1. Having three legs may spoil the horse’s looks a little but you’ll save 25% on your shoeing bill.