Top 10 Sports in rural America:

10. Pickle ball paddles are just fine for carpenter bee badminton.

9. Controversy erupts at the tee-ball game when the fine powder between second and third base has Power of Eminent Domain claimed by the Leftfielder for his 1/64 scale tractor over the Shortstop’s Hot Wheels dump truck.

8. Dirt clod fights are the best practice ever, for aspiring quarterbacks.

7. After seeing frisbee golf highlights on the sports report Grandpa states, “heck we invented that decades ago, but you sure had to properly age the suitable cow pie.”

6. The Little League parking lot has the usual vehicle assortment of one ton duallies with bale beds, a Kawasaki Mule, a real mule and a black stripe 1066 with fertilizer buggy in tow, oh and some cars.

5. The local Country Club Greenskeeper and local Ranchers commonly compare notes on grass herbicides and fertilizer recommendations.

4. The local farm kids, that averaged hauling 1200 small square bales of hay a day all summer, can’t understand why the city kids are so worn out after an August football practice in 100-degree heat.

3. Wrestling that 300-pound gilt into the stock trailer, Dad took to the processor, was a heck of a lot tougher match than the kid that outweighed you by 15 pounds in the open class.

2. During the Fall Cross-Country meet, runners are warned about following the rules, prairie dog holes, does being chased by bucks, box turtles and cow pies.

1. When the Star-Spangled Banner is played, all hats are off, all hands over the heart and everybody stands.